TEST DOING DRUGS WITH
PAUL DILLON

Going back to going to schools this week (after almost 10 days of absolutely no presenting - I didn't know what hit me!) was made so much easier due to the wonderful young women I got to meet. I was at two girls' schools in Melbourne and both were great. As always there were a wide variety of experiences in the room when it came to alcohol - at each of the sessions you could easily spot (as much as I say to the students that I don't want to know what they're doing and to use their best 'poker faces', they simply can't help themselves and give themselves away very quickly) those groups of girls who were heavily into the party scene, with alcohol obviously being very important when they socialise, but at the same time you can also see those girls who simply have no interest in alcohol whatsoever (and of course, there are all those in-between who may occasionally dabble but don't drink very much if they do). But there was one girl yesterday who really broug...

Earlier this week Prime Minister Tony Abbott launched a new task force aimed at tackling "the growing scourge of ice," and was quoted as saying that "it's far more potent, far more dangerous, far more addictive than any previous illicit drug." He then went onto state that "... this is a drug epidemic way beyond anything that we have seen before." Now I'm not going to dispute that methamphetamine is a serious issue in this country (I have already written a number of blogs on the topic including one earlier this year discussing a Herald Sun story called 'Ice Hits Schools' and another attempting to explain why this drug is so problematic) but we are now moving into a ridiculous situation which is bordering on moral panic! We've seen the tabloid press go into overdrive on this issue. We've seen stories about footballers in regional Victoria using ice to "feel like Superman as they run out onto the field", "dealers givin...

Earlier this year I wrote a blog entry discussing the issues around asking your child if they have taken drugs and they say 'no' - what do you do then? It was based around a story of a mother who had recently lost her son (apparently due to a drug overdose) and the fact that she had asked all the right questions around whether he was experimenting with drugs or not but he simply hadn't been honest. She called on other parents to keep having this difficult conversation "in a really non-threatening way so they feel like they don't have to lie." As I said before, if you're going to ask questions about possible drug use there is usually a reason. If that's the case, you've got to be prepared for one of two answers. All is fine if they say they haven't taken drugs, but what if they turnaround and tell you they are? How should a parent best respond to that situation, particularly if they make it very clear that they're not going to stop? Since t...

Discovering that your child is experimenting with illicit drugs is every parent's worst fear. No matter what their attitude towards drugs, I have yet to meet a parent who is not, at the very least, extremely distressed when they find themselves in this situation. No matter how you may have prepared yourself (and to be quite honest, I doubt whether any parent spends too long thinking about such a possibility), it is always going to evoke a whole pile of emotions. Disappointment, anger and, of course, fear are most going to be bubbling to the surface and many parents are also going to start blaming themselves in some way. Recently I was contacted by a mother who had just discovered that her son has been using cannabis. She explained the situation she found herself in and wrote "I am at a loss and not sure what to do or how to approach this, I am yet to confront him about it." The most important thing to do is also the most difficult – don't overreact! Before you respond...

I'm pretty sure that every parent realizes that they're going to have to have a conversation around alcohol and other drugs with their child at some point. The 'where do I come from?' or 'how are babies made?' talks must be confronting for some but at least they're more likely to be based on simply telling some facts around what happens 'when two people love each other ...' or the like! As much as the sex talk involves discussing your values on the issue, the one around alcohol and other drugs, particularly regarding the rules and boundaries you are going to set, is going to be different for every family and sometimes your child is not going to like what you say ...   This week I was asked by a lovely mum, obviously struggling with this issue, how best to begin the conversation with her 13 year-old son. She had heard me say during my presentation that I believe that parents should start setting rules around parties and alcohol by no later tha...

Nobody can tell a parent of an adolescent what to do with their child. Every mum and every dad is going to have to make their own decisions about how to raise their teen. Parenting is the world's most difficult job (and I'm told by so many, also the most rewarding!) and it certainly doesn't come with a rule book. That said, when I'm asked about my views on best-practice parenting around alcohol, I always say that the most important thing parents should do is follow their heart (sounds corny I know, but are you basing your decision on your own values and not simply doing what your best friend or sister-in-law is doing?) and, at the same time, look at what the most up-to-date evidence says is most appropriate and will assist in ensuring your child is happy and healthy. Each and every family is going to come up with different rules and boundaries in this area, but as long as you can be sure that you are able to live with the consequences of whatever you decide, then that i...

One of the more positive things I'm seeing at my Parent Information Evenings this year is how many parents of much younger children are now attending. Traditionally schools have pitched my talks to the parents of the students I speak to (i.e., Years 10, 11 and 12), but realistically by that time, bad habits have already been established and, as a result, it is going to be extremely difficult for changes to be made in the key areas of parental monitoring and parenting style. Of course, for those in the audience who have been doing the 'hard yards', being told by their teen that they're 'the worst parent in the world' and simply want someone to say that they're doing the right thing, a talk like mine is just what they're after! But when it comes to actually making a difference it is the parents of Years 7, 8 and 9 that I believe are the ones who should be there (and if I get primary school parents, well hallelujah!) ... One of my key messages to parents th...